Saturday, March 22, 2008

"Why do all these stupid things keep happening to me?"

Today I publicly ran into an automatic door when it refused to open for me as I was leaving Target. Walked smack into it, no doubt leaving a face print on the glass. Now why would an automatic door suddenly refuse to open? After I ran into it, it opened. After people laughed at my misfortune, it opened. So why? I feel like the girl in "Support Your Local Sheriff", who first uttered the words in quotes above.

And just so you know, this would hack me off far less if it were not the second time I've run into this very door at this very Target. Why me?

3 comments:

Moi said...

Being an ex-employee of Target (twice over, and they've asked me for a third round, the sadists/masochists), I think it's probably the security people screwing with you. My guess is if they're as demented as the ones I worked with, they're probably trying to create accidents to turn into America's Funniest Home Videos so they can win the super-mega prize of $10,000and live happily ever after in luxury. Woohoo, diamond-studded teeth for everyone!

Christina said...

Maybe you don't really exsist and thus don't set off the motion sensors for the door.

Moi said...

That could very well be. Although, another theory is maybe they've just adjusted the sensors for the size of the average 400lb American these days.